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Up until this year, I have always thought that I was heterosexual and attracted to guys. However, I have not been able to have a long or positive relationship with any males, I haven't even kissed one yet!
This year, I have started to have feeling towards girls. At first it was only a vague feeling, and was in the background of my life, so I didn't pay much attention to it. But recently it has increased to the point where I cannot concentrate on anything but my sexuality.
I have no aversion to being a lesbian, and think that I would even like the extra emotional side from being with another girl. I've even gotten to the point where I can't picture myself with men at all. The problem is, I feel so confused about these feelings after being straight for so long!

My question is 'How can I remove the barriers between my mind and heart to help deal with my new transitions?'

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Dec 08, 2015
Spanish Reading
by: Anonymous

First, I want to clarify that I'm not using the Rider-Waite deck, but a reading system in which a spanish playing deck is used. In this system, cards are drawn in three colums (after some filtering that isn't complicated in itself, but a little hard to explain). The three columns symbolize the things you have in your favor, the things you have against you, and the things you have to pay attention to, because they may help you.

In the first column (things you have in your favor) three cards popped out:

1) The sota (10) of swords. This is a face card, so it refers to a person. The swords represent rational thinking and strategy. A face card of swords usually represents a wise person. Since it isn't the knight or king, it's probably not a figure of authority, nor a person in much better standing than you, so it's probably a friend, or a co-worker. An equal.

2) The two of clubs: Clubs represent power, forces of some kind. This one isn't very high, though.

3) Ace of Gold: Golds are more commonly associated with money, but they can mean resources of any kind. They mean you have (or don't, depending on the column), whatever you need to accomplish what you want.

In a general interpretation of the column: When a face card appears, usually the whole column is related to this person. You have a wise person, that not only can help you (the power), but that also may have exactly what you need to solve your problem (the resource). It's important because this resource isn't any Gold, but the Ace, so it's powerful. If you ask me, this may mean you need to lay out your problem to a friend you trust. She or he may have just the right piece of advice.

Now to the second column:

This one doesn't look so good. Two cards showed up, and they are both Aces:

1) Ace of Clubs
2) Ace of Swords

As the Ace of Clubs showed first, we can assume the Ace of Swords is modifying it. What opposes you is a big power, very big, that is related to rational thinking. The power of the mind. This will prove a huge resistance, as this is a pure column (completely of Aces). My interpretation is that you are overthinking things, and that, yourself, is your biggest obstacle. This can completely refer to the confusion you're feeling. But there are good news in the third column...

1) Ace of Cups
2) 7 of Gold

The cups are the opposite of the swords. They represent passion, wishes, impulses... And then you have a very high Gold. Notice that you have gold in the positive column, and then here again. You really have everything you need to breach this barrier. You opposition is strong, since it has more aces than any of the other columns, but if you listen to you heart, you may be able to level the odds.

My advice: Keep in mind that there is someone there to help you, listen to them, and to your heart, and don't overthink this.

* * *

I want to get better at reading! If this helped you, or if it didn't, or if you want to get more insight by asking more questions, you can contact me at mako_tif@hotmail.com
I'll appreciate any feedback and be happy to help!

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