When I got married I dreamed of happily ever afters and growing old with my best friend. But after almost 13 years of marriage I realized that fairy tales and dreams don't always come true.
He spent most of his days and weekends with his parents and his job. Our outings were placed in hold so that he could once again help his "hurting" sister. But I still loved him, was faithful and took care of our three children.
Now since I had a full time job and coached every sport possible (so that my children could have a team), my time spent with my husband became very minimal. It really didn't matter since he was never home, but then came the arguments and fighting.
My self esteem was low and I realized that the more we lived together the less I loved him. After a while he became distant, hateful, spiteful, and even at times verbally and physically. Then when I wasn't around our children got the brunt end of it.
So we learned to stay out late and come home just in time for supper and bed. During this time, while coaching my children's team, a coach I had been coaching with for a while became good friends. He could read me like a book, knew my likes and dislikes, paid attention to my kids, and above all was there when I needed someone to lean on.
When two of my aunts passed away suddenly "A" was there. When work became too much "A" was there. When my kids couldn't wake me and needed help, yup you guessed it, "A" was there. And where was my husband...I don't know maybe at home or his work.
After a while A and I became even closer. He would spend time the my kids, take us to dinner, get the kids bday presents and even when my children's father cancelled our vacation and my children told A, he offered to take us on vacation although I refused.
Not to long ago, the inevitable happened...and it was mind blowing. I never felt guilt or was angry or sad about it. I actually felt relieved. I can say I enjoyed it and crave it even more. But I'm holding back...I'm scared not because of what I did but because I think I'm in love with him.
My husband and I have not been intimate in more than ten months because he doesn't want to f$&* a fat slob.
Now I'm confused because not only do I care for A but so do my children.
I just want to know if we have a future ? Does he feel the same way about me and my kids or are there other motives? Please help I need some guidance!
YOUR TAROT READING
This card heralds a new phase in your life. The Fool suggests the need to take a risk with an open mind and the optimism of innocence.
Six of Pentacles
It is a good time to share and receive, you may be of assistance to others.
Ten of Pentacles
You still feel overwhelmed by family responsibilities and commitments.
Queen of Swords
Stand up for yourself and focus on what you really need and want.
Three of Pentacles
Your skills and your dedication will be acknowledged. Do not overvalue family constraints and social pressure.