lav

by Lav
(Germany )

A few month ago I met a guy online. First time we texted about all and nothing, from jokes and teasing to serious stuff.

It was fun but I honestly didn't think it would lead to anything since it was just wasting the time but anyway we exchanged phone numbers and continued the texting then after a few weeks we started skype-ing.

It seemed unreal since both of us never engaged in skype-ing with strangers from other countries until now. After we got to see each other and hear, it all changed, it was more personal, had the feeling I knew him since forever and it was very easy, not awkward at all.

Since I had in plan visiting his country, before meeting him I planned a short vacation and after two months of talking almost every day I went there for a week in which we enjoyed our time and connected in a way that is hard to describe.

There were no expectations and no promises about a future, both of us are very realistic about the possibilities since we live in different countries. We had the best time of our life and I came back assuming I won't see him again.

It was hard, a bit heartbreaking though I knew before in what I'm getting myself into but it was totally worth it. We still kept in touch and since we were both still single after about 4 months, we planned another trip, same "conditions": enjoy the time we have together and no expectation or promises so no one gets hurt.

Though in my mind I know what I'm getting from this it's hard to not develop any feelings that go beyond what we already felt.

The second time I went there, it was even better and we got to spend even more time together. The last day he offered me a key of his apartment so I can go whenever I want even if he's working and maybe wouldn't be able to pick me up.

I couldn't take it cause, though we aren't officially in a relationship, I would get my hopes up and then would hurt even worse when it ends. This way at least I'm comforting myself with the idea that it is what it is and if we do get another chance to be together will be a dream come true, if not then I'll have the best memories to cherish.

The key would have been like a promise that we will get another chance at what we had, and I'm barely keeping my in check as it is.

My question is if this connection will lead to something more, is it worth it all the texting, skype-ing, planning and visiting or there is no future beyond this and it would be better just move on and find an "easier" relationship for which we wouldn't have to work that much. Thank you.


YOUR LOVE TAROT

The Moon
Things are not necessarily what they seem to be. Listen to your deepest feelings.

Page of Pentacle
A message may change the course of the events.

The Magician
Are you sure you want this relationship to last?


The Devil
It is time to revaluate the situation. Make sure you are not getting trapped in a problematic affair.

Seven of Swords
Are you feeling completely happy with this situation or is there something that subtly makes you uneasy?

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