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Free Love Tarot for GG

For the past eight years, I have been in love and in an intense online and offline relationship with a man.

The only problem is that I am also married and the mother of two children.

I have been in the marriage for a long time, but started to grow away from my husband the more I sought to fulfill my wishes to return to my home city and grow in my profession.

When I finally quit my job to pursue my own work, I started reconnecting with old friends from my past, among them an old boyfriend whom I had rejected violently many years before because I did not think we would have a successful relationship, much as we loved each other, and I was hurt and disappointed by his actions with me at the time.

When we reconnected, it was powerful and beautiful. We had a very heady, intimate daily relationship, emailing, talking and, finally, seeing each other in person.

For both of us, this has been the most intense relationship we have ever had. But we are separated by great geographic distance, and neither of us has the money to move to where the other is.

Also, I cannot bring myself to leave my family--I feel responsible for my children and to my marriage commitment.

Because of my stubbornness, despite my declarations of love, the last time I saw my lover we had a very difficult, hurtful time together and, since then, we have been somewhat distant and careful in our communication.

We are both undergoing economic difficulties as well, so that makes the situation even more tense and complicated.

On top of these issues, I see that he is a difficult person, with whom I have often experienced pain. I am sure he has also had a similar sensation with me.

Nonetheless, we do not want to stop communicating. And, in the meantime, I have been very honest with my husband, telling him that I am in love with someone else and that we should eventually separate.

My husband loves me and is willing to stay close and raise the children with me, support me and my efforts as I support his and we do our best to be caring of each other.

My question is: is it a good idea for me to continue hoping that I have a chance to fully live out my love relationship with my old/new boyfriend and return to my old/new life in my hometown, and putting my energy towards this goal or should I focus more strongly on what I have and all that is good about this--my family, my work prospects and the responsibilities I have before me, and forget about the other man?

Do we really have a chance to have a fulfilling life together? Why do I feel that this relationship is so important to who I am?


Your situation is very complex and involves many issues so I decided to use this general use spread more than a classic love and relationship layout.
Here is your reading

1 Present: How you feel about yourself now
You need to consider carefully, slow down and reevaluate your situation.

2 Hopes: What you most want at this moment
What you most want and need now is your inner strength and your ability to channel your passions constructively.

3 Fears: Your fears
Four of Swords
Are you afraid to pause and think? What would a period of reflection bring to your stressed mind?

4 Pro: What is going for you
The Emperor
Use your rationality and organization skills. Act responsibly, create stable and structured environment.

5 Con: What is going against you
Ten of Swords
You are feeling an irrevocable loss that provokes sadness and depression. You must let go of misleading illusions.

6 Outcome
King of Pentacles
Financial security is a priority. Patience and loyalty will be rewarded.

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